Gaudio's Pizzeria & Restaurant - worth the wait, and yes, you will be waiting

Ahhhh Gaudio's Pizzeria & Restaurant - yet another place that I love to hate, love to love, hate to love, and all those other mixed emotions that come along with food obsession.  Upon moving to my new 'hood, I scoped out some nearby food establishments.  One food establishment being Gaudio's. 
I remember the first time I laid eyes on Gaudio's, my first thought was "there is no way that place has passed health inspections, I'm never eating that pizza" and the second was "oh, wait, maybe they just are like innumerable other restaurants in Queens that haven't changed their appearance since 1995".  On a side note, I think 1995 was a pretty good year for pizza in my life.  I don't remember the exact details, but since I graduated elementary school that year I am pretty confident that there was a lot of pizza partying going on.  Irrelevant, sorry.  

Flash forward to a few evenings after we moved into our new apartment.  My co-diner and I are tired, lazy, don't feel like going too far for food, and want something quick and easy.  Like a flash of lightning, Gaudio's came into my life, yelling at the top of their Italian lungs, "ITSA ME GAUDIO!" 






My co-diner and I arrive, unsure if we are going to eat at Gaudio's or get our meals to go.  We wanted to feel out the atmosphere first.  I was unsure if I was going to walk into a dumpster or a scene from In Living Color.  I was even more unsure which I would prefer.  To be honest, it was kind of a combination of both.  To be even more honest, I loved every second of it.
First, I need to discuss the man who took our order.  He is the reason that I said that Gaudio's was partially like walking into a dumpster.  Now, it must be hard to keep tidy while making pizza's all day, I can understand that.  What I can't understand is smeared glasses, a drooly mouth, and just an overall "I just put my hands in places you don't even want to know" type of look.  Call me crazy, but it just doesn't exactly whet my appetite.  To make matters worse, this individual moved in slow motion.  He should actually look into a new career in Hollywood special effects because I have never seen motion this slow, even in the movies when they intentionally put a clip in slow motion.  In fact, I heard a rumor that Juvenile penned his very respecful song "Slow Motion" after this dude. 

ANYWAY, after I ordered my white slice of pizza and my co-diner ordered her regular cheese slice of pizza, we decided we wanted salads.  As soon as this dude heard that we would like salads, he said we should sit down and order from the waiter.  Upon hearing that and realizing we had to be at work tomorrow morning and probably wouldn't make it in time if we chose to take that route, we said we would have the salads to go.  I ordered Gaudio's house salad (substiting mozzarella for provolone because I respect cheese that specifically asks within it's name to be left "olone" - also I prefer to avoid curd cheese that tastes like feet).  My co-diner ordered a Gaudio's house salad (with provolone).

While we were waiting at the counter for our food another customer walked in and literally stood at the counter waiting for his order to be taken for a solid five minutes.  The man who took our order was there the entire time, looking up at the ceiling, looking down at the floor, scratching his head, scratching his nose, kneading some dough, sighing, looking at the ceiling, etc.  Finally, he said something that could not be understood, along the lines of "do you need help?" to which the customer responded "yes, that would be great" with a sigh of relief.  Well, fast forward another solid five to seven minutes later and another five to ten senseless tasks later and still the customer was not helped.  Finally, the customer made eye contact with the dude and the dude said something along the lines of "oh, I thought you said you were being helped," and proceeded to half turn around, but listened to the customer's order.  Along with whatever the customer ordered, he ordered a regular can of Pepsi.  Well, something went way over the dude's head because he first presented him with a Diet Pepsi, then he gave him a Pepsi Max, FINALLY, he figured out that "the regular pepsi can is blue" meant, the blue can, not the black or silver one.






After this display, we finally received our food.  We paid and were on our way.  To be honest, I didn't fully appreciate the scenes that had developed before me until later on.  After giving it some thought, I realized that I had just received some of the best comedy and entertainment of my life all for the price of a slice of pizza and a salad.  Talk about a bargain.
Now, onto the food, the white slice was delicious.  It was the perfect amount of crisp, without being crunchy.  The salad was great as well, my one complaint would be there definitely is a bit of zest or flavor missing from the dressing, which could be due to the fact that there was not much dressing on the salad.  My co-diner said the regular slice was delicious also.  Again, the perfect amount of crisp. 
A few days later, there we were again, lazy and not motivated to cook.  We had the crave, the Gaudio's crave.  Unfortunately for us, this crave was depraved because it was a Monday and as we learned, Gaudio's is closed on Monday's.
Not to worry, Gaudio's re-entered our lives a few nights later.  This time, we decided to dine in.  Our buddy, the dude, (as I have been referring to him) was present, but we would not get to experience his quirks except at a distance because we had a waiter instead.  Nonetheless, the dude provided entertainment from our seats.  We made sure our seats were front and center to fully witness all of his actions.  Our waiter was a nice italian gentleman who provided prompt and friendly service, despite the fact that Gaudio's is Gaudio's and you will wait whether you are the only person in the restaurant or one of a hundred.  My co-diner and I both ordered Gaudio's salad, again, hers with feet, mine without.  Like last time, the salads were great except the dressing was again missing something.  We also decided to split the baked ziti dish and garlic knots.  The garlic knots were phenomenal.  Honestly, out of this world and from whatever world it is that the dude comes from.  I wish he had given me some of his slow motion power while eating them because I wanted them to last forever.  Amazing.  They were a texture in between perfectly soft/moist and crisp and had the right amount of garlic and were not drenched in oil.  The baked ziti came out a while later and was great.  I won't say it is the best baked ziti I have ever had, but it was pretty delicious.  The portions are generous, you won't leave overly stuffed on just the baked ziti, but you won't leave hungry either.  You will be satisfied.
What I've learned about Gaudio's is that you have to go in with an open mind and willing to wait.  Would I go there if I was in a huge rush?  Probably not, no.  Would I go in there expecting to receive a regular can of soda as opposed to a diet soda on the first try?  Don't be crazy, no.  Would I go in there expecting an out of this world slice and garlic knots?  Is the number eight even?  Can an ant typically lift and carry twenty or more times its body weight?  All ridiculously easy questions, with simple answers, YES, YES, and YES!






Gaudio's is somewhere that I think I'll feel pretty comfortable calling home after a few more visits.  I'm looking forward to a great many years ahead being entertained by the employees of Gaudio's and enjoying some great pizza and garlic knots while I'm at it.
Gaudio's - don't you go changing on me.